GROSS WEATHER.

So ever since Friday, all i've been hearing was something bout Michael Jackson or his songs or something. I know he died and all, and a lot of people are sad about it. But does it mean that you guys have to play his songs and stuff just because he died. When clearly you guys didn't listen to him when he was alive. Well too bad, we can't bring him back to life now can we? Saturday came and picked up Klaudine from work with my boyfriend playing MJ's songs and they go on ranting and ganging up on me. But whatever you guys love me :) lol. After dropping Klaudine home after her work, me & boyfriend went to my little cousin's birthday party at Sheraton hotel. Sheraton wasn't that biggie to me cuz I'm always there, but when I saw our rooms, it was sick. 3rd floor and there was a back door that was few steps away from the pool and the weight room. The pool was whirlpool meaning the water was heated, there was a hot tub, and a big ass gym. When we got settled me & baby decided to walk around downtown and watch The Hangover, it was funny but at the same time gross lol. Since we already watched transformers and there wasn't anything else to watch =P. I also saw Justin Alvero, LOL i remembered those days with Athina & Alyssa. Around 1230ish, me & baby dropped my parents to get their cars and went home :) It was a fun day.
Sunday was just work, gosh I was so tired that I slept at 9. It even came to the point where baby called me last night and i just slept on him, sorry babe.
Today I officially started my sleeping in days :) lol, I slept in until 1. Felt so nice. I woke up to really crappy weather, hopefully this weather doesnt continue until wednesday since it's a holiday and it's our 5 months :) I'm excited, I wonder what his gift is..lol kidding. But ya I guess I'm just going to clean my room for the whole day. Throw out all the garbage I dont need anymore and stuff. hopefully the day goes by quick. I miss my boyfriend =(

con-GRAD-ulations.

I can finally say I'm officially done & over high school. Like what Andrew Song our Valedictorian stated, our life is like a movie and we're moving on to make the best movie out of our life. I'm proud of everyone that made it through four years, the memories will last, the friendships, the hardships, the skipping, the easy teachers, the dramas, etc. everything was worth while. I must say that lining up and spending the whole day standing on heels never felt better. I got diploma, it was something I worked for and I've earned it. Now it's just the beginning of my real life. No more kiddish things, this is where reality begins. I was quite disappointed that the special people I wanted to be there wasn't there, I won't say much bout my night but all I can say was breaking down after all my stress never felt so good. It just took one simple action to break me down, and my balloon of tears overflowed with tears for the whole night. I should go shopping to make me feel better, but me & baby are going shopping next week. I believe? =) so I guess I should just get ready to see him tonight. perhaps play some ball and enjoy the weather =]

YAY, my internet is back.. Today is the hottest day of the week, frikking 35 degrees out. So decided to spend the day with my boyfriend.
Grad is tomorrow, hopefully it's not long even though i know it will be but whatever.

Ill blog later.
-dee

no mood.

Why is today giving me sh*t, honestly I have been home since yesterday minding my own business until everyone decided to ruin it. Like first I'm at the library right now because my mom dragged me here to help her with something because BELL is having troubleshooting with their internet. Geez, Rogers was so much more better. Why tell me why my boyfriend would use 'reverse phsychology' on me? like who does that, no offence. But are you just trying to find a way to piss me off? and you go off telling me that I always pick the fights? but whatever. Like honestly once I say I dont have facebook anymore, I DONT. Like let's be real here. Anyways I just wanted to vent off things here since I think thats the only thing that can help me throught times like this.
I just can't wait to go out with him tomorrow, and watch the hangover? It's gun be such a nice day and hopefully everything goes well.
Ill blog more later if Bell is quick enough to fix problems.

-DEE

fina-efin-lly

Today was my last exam, it was more of like the hardest and one of the most important exams I had to do. It's Chem. I couldn't think of anything for the whole weekend but this exam. No matter how much I studied I was still confused with a lot of things. I was even complaining to my classmates about how nervous and about how much I didn't wanna do it. But like what baby said it's better to get part marks done nothing at all. Surprisingly the exam was fairly easy, I mean there wasn't any surprises that wasn't on the review. I actually knew how to answer them. Thank you Lord for answering my prayers . After exams me, Lauren & Jenny went to eat pho. Wow that's the last time i ate at that restaurant being a highschool student. The memories throughout the years in that restaurant are still fresh lol. Can't wait for grad, and I can finally say I'm proud of myself.

-
Friday was good, after baby running 10 laps at the Gonzaga track, we went to watch the proposal, what a funny movie. And saturday was really really really flop plus it was gloomy outside which made it worst. Until baby came over round 930 to save my day =) mom bought pizza and me and baby rented from hell, which was actually the first horror movie that I didn't cover my eyes and cling on to baby. Funny thing is we both fell asleep lol cuz it was so long.

Anyways Sunday was Father's day. I'm thankful for the dad that god has given me, I love him a lot. And as for my other dad, i miss you, the fact that you don't recognize me as much and the fact that you don't show the proper way of having a daughter hurts me a lot. I know it's not you're fault that we haven't seen each other for almost 10 years maybe more. But the thought that you remember me and give me a call once in a while honestly wouldn't kill you. But I guess you have your own life now and I hope you still will never remember your one and only Danielle, Like what my aunts and my grandparents always tell me, "you're dad will always love you no matter what". Those words are the only thing that are making me not forget about you. I know it's mean but you can't blame a child that you left and never once remembered. Regardless, I was thought to forgive no matter the situation, forgiveness is love and I love you. Hope that connects. Happy Fathers Day, even if you're not reading this, at the end of the day you still are my father, I hope to see you at the proper time.

- DEE

FLOP.

LOL, just read Athina's blog and that picture of their future son is cute lmao. He's pudgey wifey :P. I'm happy that James is doing his hard work on your relationship, honestly, after the long years of knowing James, this the time I can honestly say that I'm proud of him! I'm happy for you two and I love you two a lot :).
As for Barrie, IT'S FLOP. Stupid weather had to ruin everything. I think I'm going to let Athina & James have their cute moment together or am I sensing the 'third wheel' status again? OMG, last summer was already enough for me guys. Almost everyday I was a third wheel, but it's okay :) lol. Since the boyfriend doesn't want to spend the day with me which is very dry I guess I'll have to find something else to do. Is my face that ugly that he doesn't wanna spend Saturdays with me no more? hmm. I think so lol. Who's down? movie? eat? shopping? what? whatever, I don't want to be stuck here. Anyways my exam review is being anal right now. I don't understand jack shit, but when I look at my tests for those units I did a pretty good job.. But whatever I'll blog later, or tomorrow, or whenever..

Later days.
-Dee

P.s.
I honestly slept last night feeling contented and happy. Happy that I thought he finally came to his senses that he should do something bout this. I mean it's breaking us, making us fall apart and yet we are blinded by the fact that it's the other persons fault. I guess I should just let things flow, it is what it is now. I'm not just blaming it all on you, but me too. But the fact that It's so hard to get within that wall you built is making me lose hope. I just hope you realize, that it isn't a joke no more.

I miss you.

I miss the times when we would fight and I didn't have to give in & you would just say 'i miss you ' and everything would be fine. I miss the cute moments we would have together just staring at each other like we were the only ones in the world. I miss the 'I love yous' that you would let me know every minute of everyday. I miss laughing with you like nothing else mattered. I miss the big bear hugs you would give me in front of everyone. I miss the late night phone calls, when we would just talk and talk. I miss you telling me that I was the only one for you. I miss the times when I would cry and you'd just comfort me and make sure I was okay or when I would cry and you'd just kiss me and forgive the things I have said or done. I miss the cheesyness you would tell me. I miss the times I felt that I was the only one that mattered for you. I miss knowing everything, from where you are to what time you're coming to see me. I miss just cuddling on my couch with you and falling asleep together. I miss the times you would surprise me by telling me you would skip work and spend the day with me even if it means we would just sleep on my bed until noon. I miss you worrying about me all the time. I miss you telling me that 'US' is your future. I miss all the silliness we would never have now adays. I miss getting along with you. I miss knowing the fact I didn't have to worry about a thing, cuz you got me no matter what. I miss the little sweet letters you would always give me because you thought of me wherever you were. I also miss the person that gave me a promise ring and promised me all the things he could and actually make an effort to do them. I miss the old you, that didn't get annoyed by me all the time. I miss the old you that never wanted to go even if I tell you to go home because you fell asleep while watching with me. I miss fixing your clothes. I miss the silly time on the court when you would change and you would hide behind me so no one can see you.I miss the tears of joy. I miss our little walks at the park when we would just talk about our relationship & our future plans. I miss you agreeing with me and promising me you'll do certain things and looking me in the eye. I miss the old you that would never blame me about anything. I miss the person that never thought bad things about me.

I miss you, I miss us, I miss everything..
I want my ugly back.

No matter the situation, as I said



I'll always love you.


-DEE

mr. unfaithful

SAY HELLO TO MR. UNFAITHFUL

signs he's cheating..

1. Mr. Mood swings.
He will act differently towards you by either being extra kind or extremely mean. Your partner may choose to love you more than ever by treating you affectionately at times and other times he may be acting aggressively and picking a fight about something that he never used to before. Everything becomes your fault, you are a tyrant and he starts saying that he feels suffocated. The next day you are the most beautiful creature he has ever seen in his life, you are the moon and the stars, the whole world, you are... well you get my point. Unless they have been diagnosed with bipolar depression, this is a major sign that something is up.

2. Change of routine.
This is also a major sign that he may be spending his time with someone else. For example, if he has been calling you at 9 p.m. every day in the past and now you don’t get that call anymore for a significant period of time, and by that I mean approximately 2 weeks, then you know something is going on. If everything else is constant in routine, then the behavior that follows that routine should be the same also. This is a major warning sign and along with it come other signs that something else is occupying his time.

3. Change in leisure time with "the boys".
If suddenly your partner starts spending more time with his friend or friends and less time with you this could mean that the friend or friends may be another girl that he would rather spend his time with. Don’t misinterpret this sign. If you have just had an argument and he storms out upset and doesn’t come back for an hour or two, this is not an indication of infidelity. However, if for a few weeks now every other night is "Hun, I’m going out with my boys", then you have every right to be suspicious.

4. What I’d like to call "The mystery man"
All of sudden everything becomes a secret. You don’t know where he is and who he is with. He gives you one word answers to questions of his whereabouts. All of a sudden he screens your calls or hardly ever picks up when you call and takes hours to return your messages. He all of a sudden has to take grandma to the doctor or his pet had an appointment you had no idea about. Work became more demanding or his best friend had a crisis. Basically any excuse that he can come up with to cover the time that he went missing.

5. The NEW friend.
One day within your conversation your partner reveals that he has become friendly with someone of the opposite sex. He tells you that this new friend is in his life but that they are "just friends". If this is common practice in your relationship, all the power to you. But in most serious relationships friends of the opposite sex don’t come into the picture unless they are also in a relationship and you hang out all together as couples. This new friend may become a love interest some day.

6. LESS SEX/NO SEX
I was thinking how to put this in a more respectful way but I am just going to come out and say it. You have now become sexually frustrated. No more sex or a lot less sex with your partner. This is a major sign that your mate is getting some somewhere else. You try and try, you put on your special perfume, highest pumps you own and your best outfit. You have used all the tricks that you know would have had him begging for more. Nothing works! Well listen, unless he has some great excuse, like a nasty rash he doesn’t want to infect you with (but then again, that’s a sign within itself), there is no good enough reason why he would not want to enjoy a great night of exciting fun.

7. Change in grooming practice.
He all of a sudden starts to smell better than ever, wears nicer clothes, shines his shoes and sprays a little extra cologne when he goes out. Well, well if it isn’t Mr. Fabio himself! The days at the gym may start getting longer and instead of 2 days a week it has now turned into 5. Clean shaven all the time, he is hardly the man you used to know. Believe me, this new grooming practice is not because his mom made a comment about his appearance, it’s because there is someone he has his eye on. There is no way a man will go out of his way to look better for you now; he has become comfortable and secure in what he has and it’s time for something new. So, ladies, keep an eye out for this one.

I'm currently at the library supposed to be studying for CHEM lol. Along with Athina, buggin James to come pick her up, and Klaudine trying to study. Geez man my brain is hurting like a mother. But before this me & Klaudine went to Denny's to eat breakfast. We're fulllllll. lol big time. Anyways I got cosmo exam tomorrow, but clearly I'm not studying for that since it's not that imprortant. But whatever.

Plans this week are study study study,
then friday shopping, get Athina & Klaudine after their exam. Then watch a movie with Klaudine, then see my baby at 10.

LOL @ Athina doing 2 questions on her Math exam. <3

Exams started today, I'm officially over & done Religion :) my hard work of studying yesterday along with Klaudine, Athina & friends payed off. Like I literally had to go in one of those study rooms so I can concentrate lol, since all we were doing at the table were laughing and fooling around. I finally seen my wifey, after a long time, I missed her gosh. But like what I told her before I left the library 'ill be coming out of my shell soon, and you're mine' lol. Special thanks to my boyfriend that brought me to the Erin Mills library to study with me and explain the things I didn't understand :) thank you hun. That's one of the advantages of having a smart boyfriend :) lol, then he treated me out for dinner, since I wasn't that hungry I just shared with him lol. Sorry for pinching you a lot :) .. lol remember what pain is =P

Tomorrow, is my day off, which means studying again. But I don't need to study much since it's cosmetology. Hope I can see baby tomorrow, and/or Friday :)

- Dee

LOL, failed my chemistry lab exam.. well i think. but honestly everyone did. that's how you know this time it's not only me slacking.. too much stress, but ill be done with it in a week. then I'll be free :), when i said i was going to hibernate i did lol. but im gunn come out of my shell soon :):):), can't wait. I missed my friends, miss the movie nights, I miss the random chillages everywhere, I miss downtown with Athina, I miss summer 08.

if you guys have nothing better to say bout my situation, jst keep your comment to yourself. got a problem with my posts, then don't read my posts. who invited you to read them anyways? no one, so if you're gun hate keep the hate to yourself thank you very much ..

WTF, i'm so stressed. STRESSED MORE THAN EVER.. stressed to the point where I let it ruin the relationship, ruin things that I have left, ruin everything. FUCK ME!.. when it comes to stress, I'm such a sucky person. So much isu's, tests, exams, papers due, etc. and so little time..

Thank you for holding me down, & holding on to me no matter the situation. Forgive my stubbornness & the hardships I put you through, I swear I'll owe you one when this is all over. I love you.

-

yea , we've had our fights and we've put each other through hell . We've picked each other up when one of us fell . We'll always be together ,because i honestly don't know where I'd be without you .

So about my last post, I guess I'll keep this one .. lol anyways, the weekend was bomb digity. Friday was one of my best Fridays yet. Baby really made up for me missing prom. Being away from all the crap & stress & blah's we're both going through, even just for a day & the next really felt good. I guess I can also say that, that was his gift for me for our fourth monthsary :). It's cute, and it should be a must again.. Perhaps my birthday? this time, my treat :). Over all it was so fun, it also brought down the troubles we were having as for our relationship. I guess we just really missed each other. Watching fireworks was such a cute scenery, I so want fireworks when I get married, or like when something special happens lol. Wonderland was also bomb, even though we were both tired, I have 4 new stuffed toys :) lol, the family is growing aha. No one really ever did any of these things for me until now, & I'm loving it.. Thank you Baby, YOU'RE THE BEST!! but you gotta stop spoiling me! I LOVEEEEEE YOU

Now, it's back to reality.. few more days and I'm finally going to be stress free. Can't wait =P


i so want a copy of this pleaseeeee ? =]

no more facebook,
no more blogger,
no more nothing
for now ..

CIAO!

UN-stressed?

I'm finally done my cosmetology practical exam. It was pretty hard doing Maryse's hair today because of her daughter, but she was so cute. I love her to death lol. Thank God I finished without having to cry, I was about to but no. I'm still stressed but I think I'll get through it.

can't wait for tomorrow :), I really really really really really really need a get away. I also really really really really really really need to finish packing lol. FUCK MY LIFE.

SO like I think I need a new layout. I'm getting bored of my one right now. Wow for the past week until now I haven't skipped a day of school, & I'm hella proud of myself :) .. Shit, I have two weeks of school left and I'm still procrastinating about my ISU's that are due by next week. KILL ME NOW! just kidding, I'd rather live lol. The last few days of high school is going to be really rough for me, but what hard work pays off. I'm proud of myself, I'm actually graduating on time without failing one class & having more credits than I need, when I fully doubted myself before.

I don't know if it's just me or what.. but I feel like right now there's a lot of tension between us. The way you talk to me is so different compared to the way you talked to me months ago. I feel like this is the only way I can vent this out, & don't get me wrong I'm doing this not because I'm hating but because I care, I still care, & always will. Ya, we don't fight every night, but I feel like you're getting bored of the same old me. Not showing interest in me hurts me, don't get me wrong but I seek for your interest too, I seek for every single thing. I don't know if I'm thinking right but I want attention from you, I don't wanna sound selfish but I am. Just because I learned how to depend on you when no one else is there but a friend or two. I'm not trying to fight with you, if that's what you think. I know you're gunn bring this up but just know that other than telling you, this is another way of me venting out. I know we promised certain things to each other that I personally think helped us to get to this point of our relationship. Some of those promises is to tell each other if feelings changed, hearts are hurt, feelings are hurt, etc. I have a lot of things going in my mind right now & I know you do too. But right now you are the center of my world and if I'm not yours please let me know. I won't get mad, all i ask for you is to be honest with me. Don't you think that after what we've been through I know you by now? I do, & I know when something is up or something is wrong. I just don't want to have the thought of losing you slowly because you didn't tell me early enough. I know that you like the reassurance that I give you in every possible best way that I can, but I would like some reassurance too. I'm sorry, but baby I'm selfish.

-
ANYWAYS .. awkward, ummmmm YA UP UP UP UP UP OMG.

Honestly, RUSSEL looks like Ray when he was a little kid. I wan't a stuffed RUSSEL :) I'm so getting one if they make one.. DISNEY STORE here i come :) ♥





-DEE

HAPPPPPY 4 MONTHS BABY! :)

We made it omgaah, so much frikking hardships we went through for the past four months honestly. But I'm glad, like what Klaudine says.. That we're not fighting, that we're actually starting to know how to put up with each other. Well you at least, I know I still have mood swings here & there, & I'm sorry, you know I don't mean them.. Last night I was praying to God that hopefully we will continue to put up with each other no matter what. I know that God will give both of us the strength & patience for this.. =] I LOVE YOU !

OMG, i can't believe exams are coming up soon. I'm stressing over my CPT's & stuff like honestly, especially Religion's CPT. Oh well I'm going to make it up I don't care lol. DRAG ME TO HELL, was so scary, holy I wanted to shit my pants. I still wanna see UP, since that little boy Russel looked like Ray when he was a little kid, LOL KLAUDINE the picture :P .. I DONT CARE, i'm watching it :)

Can't wait for the weeeeeekend :) yay